Miss Manners: My boyfriend berated me in the parking lot over how I exited the church

DEAR MISS MANNERS What is the proper way to exit a church at the end of a provision Related Articles Miss Manners I gave my neighbor treats and got a rude phone call in return Miss Manners She threatened to call the cops on me in church Miss Manners Is there a polite way to satisfy my curiosity about the waitress Miss Manners Would it be crass to give a young widow money rather than flowers Miss Manners What s the rule about giving an ultimatum to a friend My boyfriend thinks that you must let everyone in the adjacent pew the one closer to the doors exit before you do I view it more like a street intersection but less formal where groups of people take turns exiting In my view you should not try to rush bump or push people out of the way but you should also go with the flow and not hold people up My boyfriend thought I was very rude and berated me in the parking lot because I did not let all of the people in the next pew exit first Instead I followed the woman in front of me She had invited the people in the other pew to go first but they mentioned no waving her ahead I followed her out without stopping to invite the same people to exit first Was I rude GENTLE READER Miss Manners agrees that if someone asks people to go ahead then the request should be obeyed as it may mask a need for more time to disembark You would hardly want to get into a pushing match in church with an elderly couple by insisting that you are not going anywhere until they get a move on Why you would want a boyfriend who berates you is another question DEAR MISS MANNERS My boyfriend and I share an apartment and also share two pet snakes These are not large reptiles and are kept in very secure glass tanks behind closed doors We understand that a large number of people are not content with reptiles so we never let them roam around the apartment If we have company we never bring our pets out or even open the door to that room they stay absolutely out of sight We would never presume to force anyone to interact in the slightest with an animal that caused them anxiety The trouble is that my boyfriend s father is so afraid of snakes that he will not even set foot in the apartment despite the fact that they are securely contained and not visible I would love to be able to entertain his family in our home but his father is adamant that he will not come over until the snakes are no longer there Related Articles Asking Eric How do we stop their hit-and-run gift giving Harriette Cole She thinks her kids are so much better than mine Miss Manners I gave my neighbor treats and got a rude phone call in return Dear Abby My husband secretly invited his new buddy to our house Asking Eric We didn t have a fight but I haven t seen my boyfriend in months Is it rude of us to persist in eating meals at their house and then not reciprocating We are young and broke so entertaining them in a restaurant is not a real possibility Do we have to get rid of two pets in order to satisfy his father GENTLE READER What you need is a mutual agreement on how you will reciprocate their hospitality Would your boyfriend s parents for example be amenable to having you sometimes prepare and bring a meal to them Surely that is preferable to finding alternative living arrangements for Antony and Cleopatra Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website www missmanners com to her email gentlereader missmanners com or through postal mail to Miss Manners Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO