Miss Manners: Her joke about dodging the check turned out not so funny

DEAR MISS MANNERS My husband and I hosted a longtime friend of mine for days at our home Related Articles Miss Manners My fun party meeting went off the rails when my guest was arrested Miss Manners My fiance s family is upset about the wedding gift situation Miss Manners Is it gauche to give visitors a grand tour of my house Miss Manners She keeps saying we need to go out and get crazy I absolutely do not want to Miss Manners Can I weigh in on a woman s clownish makeup She had advised me she enjoys staying with friends for extended periods finding it an efficient way to tour She did not bring her own bathroom essentials vitamins slippers etc We did all the driving and the planning We cooked and served every breakfast lunch and dinner along with providing beer and wine every day Typically she drinks much more than we do Often she would ask the menu for the day and I would prepare a shopping list She would join me in the shopping and point out items she thought would be helpful I invited her to purchase items she longed outside the menu but her answer constantly was I ll have whatever you re having We narrated her we were happy to dine out if she did not mind separate checks She reported yes but added that a man s ego usually prevents this so I should make sure my husband was on the same page He was She secretly joked with me that if she stares at the check long enough someone will grab it We dined out once and included another couple and everyone received their own check She took us out to dinner at the end of her stay as a thank-you My manners taught me to be a generous host and I believe we were all the way to the end when I drove her to the airport However I feel like our generosity was taken advantage of Where is the line Is a longer-term guest expected to pitch in I will definitely think attentively about a future invite GENTLE READER A longer-term guest is expected to do more and Miss Manners agrees your friend fell short But where the line is drawn can be challenging since any equalization of expense is meant to occur by the balancing of invitations not within a single visit Where your friend offended bulk was when she all but stated you she was sticking you with the expenses joining the shopping expedition and standing at the checkout counter but never offering to pay joking about staring at the check the comment about a man s ego She would be a much more effective moocher not to mention a much more pleasant houseguest if she would learn when to keep her thoughts to herself DEAR MISS MANNERS I have an acquaintance who frequently walks her dog at the same time I do We are both female She is a nice person and we get along well our dogs even like each other Related Articles Dear Abby My son s DNA test says he s part Jewish and he doesn t know why Where is our Mexican vacation refund We ve been waiting for months Asking Eric They insist on having their child piggyback on my son s birthday party Harriette Cole Gentle parenting is not going to solve this kid s issue Miss Manners My fun party contest went off the rails when my guest was arrested The issue is that her skirts or sundresses keep getting shorter I avert my eyes but I have seen more of her anatomy than I care to I have also seen a certain male neighbor looking at her in a not-so-nice way Should I say something to her If so how do I do so politely GENTLE READER Really as this person is merely an acquaintance Miss Manners fails to see why you would wish to raise the question of who is sniffing whom at all The Asking Eric column answered a similar question Here s what Eric commented about the short-skirted companion Please send your questions to Miss Manners at her website www missmanners com to her email gentlereader missmanners com or through postal mail to Miss Manners Andrews McMeel Syndication Walnut St Kansas City MO